Author Archives: newstart4liz

Anniversaries … Going on Without Her

For Kari it started in the summer, looming like the forecast of an oncoming hurricane, still distant but with 100% certainty of landfall. On a specific date: the location, her heart. For me, I only became aware of it in … Continue reading

Posted in Anniversary of Death of Child, Divorced Family coping with Loss of a Teenager, Loss and Grief and Healing, Writing | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

The Around and Around of Grief

I’m angry. Its early morning and I open my eyes to a foggy grayness that I sometimes sense inside my head. But not today. Today I wake up instantly alert… and angry. I feel the anger in my ribs as … Continue reading

Posted in Anniversary of Death of Child, Grief and Loss, Mother mourning Loss of a Daughter, Writing | Tagged , , , , , , | 7 Comments

Out of the Light of Chaos

This is what I had been waiting for. I am standing in the kitchen my hands wrapped around a mug of coffee. It is early, or it seems so as I am still waking up. I am frustrated that the … Continue reading

Posted in Kari Watson Composer, Mother Daughter Relationships, Mother's Healing Journey after Loss, Music and Emotion, Writing | Tagged , , , , | 2 Comments

Losing her Over and Over Again

I sit at the traffic light watching the young girl in black stretch pants and sneakers cross the road with her mom. She has hair which almost reaches down to her waist. Some would call it blonde. To me it … Continue reading

Posted in Grief and Loss, Mother Grieving a Child, Teenager who died from Leukemia: Mother's Memories, Writing about Grief | Tagged , , , , , , | 4 Comments

A Twin, Alone on her Birthday…

Imagine being eighteen and dreading your birthday. The dread arrives weeks before your birthday does. It arrives on wings edging its way through your dorm room window, sliding in a crack open against the stuffy heat of the college heating … Continue reading

Posted in birthdays and grieving, loss of one twin, Writing | Tagged , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Turning Hallmark Traditions into something Special with Spirit…Lessons from the other side.

I didn’t look up when I spoke. The words sort of tumbled out from I don’t know where. “Why don’t you make him one anyway,” I said. My voice was soft, sort of questioning. “Where would I send it?” she … Continue reading

Posted in remembering and memorials, Spiritual Beliefs, Writing about Loss of a daughter | Tagged , , , | 2 Comments

Holiday Traditions and Memories.

In the spirit world time does not exist. Everything happens simultaneously. The striking of midnight, signifying the changing of the years, is inconsequential. So as I sit here thinking about how with each year passing I move further and further … Continue reading

Posted in Celebrating the Holidays after Loss of a Child, Divorced Family Celebrating Together, Love and Loss, Memories and Revisiting Places after Losing a Child, Mother's Healing Journey after Loss, Writing about Grief | Tagged , | Leave a comment

Christmas Memories, Jesi and the love of Mimi.

Five days before Christmas marked the fourth anniversary of Mimi’s arrival into our family. I still remember as if it was yesterday; the day we rescued her from the Animal Rescue League of Boston. Three weeks prior to signing her … Continue reading

Posted in Losing a Child, Pets as therapy for sick children, Writing about Grief | Tagged , , | 6 Comments

Trees and Angels and Believing

The day I learnt the Magnificent Redwood Tree in Prouty Garden had been taken to with saws and axes in the first stages of the destruction of the healing space at Childrens Hospital Boston; the place where Jesi, conscious and … Continue reading

Posted in angels, Mother's Healing Journey after Loss, Prouty Garden Childrens Hospital Boston, Spiritual Beliefs, Writing about Grief | Tagged , , , , , | 6 Comments

Family Weekend for Kari … How Jesi makes her presence felt!

Online registration for Family Weekend at Oberlin College is frustrating. Even the woman on the other end of the phone, an Oberlin employee who I have called for assistance keeps reminding me so, although the knot in the base of … Continue reading

Posted in College Freshman after Loss of Twin Sister to Cancer, Divorced Family coping with Loss of a Teenager, Spiritual Beliefs, Using Music as an Agent for Healing after Losing a Twin, Writing | Tagged , , | 6 Comments